St。 Jude’s classmates。 Jeremy had always been excessively skinny and only about five foot two； but he’d obviously had a late…adolescent growth spurt in college。 He was huge； massive！ Jeremy was trailed by Charlie Dern and Anthony Avuldsen； who were wearing matching Hamilton College visors perched on the sides of their heads to plement their matching beer guts。
Nate held out a hand and Jeremy； Charlie； and Anthony all slapped it in turn； their customary salute。 Charlie’s eyes bugged beneath his floppy bangs as he took in his old friend。 “I thought you were in； like； the army。”
Close enough。
“Nah； I was in school；” Nate said。 While he was excited to see his old St。 Jude’s buddies； he didn’t really feel like playing catch…up。 How could he explain about sailing the world； about Chips； about what he was up to now？ They probably had no clue what Deep Springs was or what it was really about。 But he knew Serena would get it。 He suddenly wanted to be with Serena； alone。
“Where have you guys been？ Beer Pong State？” Serena easily teased the guys。
Nate cracked a grin； glad that Serena was acting so chill。 She hadn’t grabbed his wrist； dragged him to a corner； and yelled at him for being an asshole。 That was nice。
Nate realized that everyone was looking at him curiously and snapped out of his reverie。 “I know how to milk a cow；” he said randomly。
Congratulations。
“Man； really？” Jeremy asked； his eyes wide。 “So； like； you just squeeze？”
“Well； sort of。” Nate thought back to Juliet； his favorite cow in the barn。 He’d sometimes find himself whispering to her； telling her stories about the day or asking her questions。 He’d always feel reassured when she’d moo back； as if she understood what he meant。 In a way； it was the same way he felt when he was with Serena。 Not like Serena reminded him of a cow； but he didn’t feel nervous or scared or judged when he was with her。 It was nice。
“Really？” Serena asked； grinning as if it was the most amusing thing she’d heard all day。 Nate felt a surge of pride to realize he could still make her smile。 Did that mean she forgave him？
Maybe he should ask his cow what she thinks。
“Yeah。 Her name’s Juliet；” Nate said。 He didn’t really want to talk about cows anymore； but if he wasn’t talking about that； he didn’t know what he’d start babbling about。 Cows seemed like a pretty safe choice。 “She has really long eyelashes and likes to be touched behind the ears。”
Don’t we all？
“Should I be worried？” Serena giggled。 She couldn’t believe she’d been so nervous about talking to Nate。
“Dude； you either got really fucking weird or you have some fucking amazing weed I need to sample immediately。” Anthony wiggled his eyebrows crazily。
“Nah；” Nate replied simply。
“I’m getting some brews。” Anthony turned on his heel； trailed by Charlie and Jeremy。
Nate shook his head dreamily； as if he hadn’t noticed they’d already left。 “I can’t believe you’re here；” he said to Serena。 A stray eyelash sat on her cheekbone。 He gently brushed it away with his index finger before he realized he should have saved it。 When they were little； Serena had taught him to make a wish on an eyelash and then blow it away。
“Did you steal my wish？” Serena asked； tilting her face up toward him。
“I hope not；” Nate whispered huskily as he leaned down to kiss her。
Wish granted。
for auld lang syne
“Are you ready？” Blair fidgeted with the clasp on her Prada clutch while Pete sipped his cappuccino。 It was already eleven o’clock。 They were at Da Silvano on West Fourth for a romantic New Year’s dinner before they headed to the party in the Bass suite。 She couldn’t wait to show off Pete to all her bitchy former Constance classmates—including Serena。 Blair figured she’d be there and planned to act cordial。 After all； it must be hard to be a boyfriendless； confused； washed…up ex–movie star at the tender age of nineteen。
How generous of her。
Blair wore a tight black and silver DVF dress； and Pete’s blond hair flopped adorably into his blue eyes。 In his bright blue Thomas Pink button…down； he made the perfect accessory。
She smiled in satisfaction； trying to stifle a yawn。 She didn’t want to be tired； but it had been a long day。 They’d spent Christmas in LA with her family； and had just gotten to the city this afternoon。 Pete had always wanted to celebrate New Year’s in New York； and Blair was excited to show him where she grew up； especially after spending a week in her family’s tacky Pacific Palisades McMansion。 She couldn’t wait to reexperience all the cheesy romantic things New York had to offer with her boyfriend。 She wanted to go skating at Wollman Rink； take a horse…drawn carriage ride through Central Park while sipping mulled wine out of a thermos； and have drinks at Top of the Rock。 Even though Blair hated cheesiness； she didn’t mind it when she was with Pete。
Aw。
“Ready。” Pete put down his cup and signaled to the waiter for the check。 “So； remind me who I’m going to meet tonight？” He took his AmEx from his worn leather wallet and slipped it in the folder。
“Well； Chuck is hosting the party。 He’s… plicated；” Blair began。 plicated was an understatement。 Senior year； Chuck had practically molested every member of the Constance Billard student body； then had bee what could only be described as gay； wearing socks with monkey appliqués on them。 Now he went to Deep Springs； some queer…sounding all…guys college in California。 Deep Springs was a working farm where students cultivated alfalfa and read Proust。 Which was all random； but sort of fit Chuck’s try…anything…once personality。 The most bizarre thing was that Nate was apparently there as well。 When he’d run out on her and Serena last winter； Blair had half expected him to e to Yale anyway。 But when the first week of classes came and went without him； and when she called his cell and found it was disconnected； she’d known he was gone for good。 Which was probably for the best。
A few weeks after the start of the semester； on a snowy Wednesday； she’d spotted Pete walking into the student center。 She’d spontaneously gone to the coffee bar； bought a medium coffee； skim milk； no sugar； walked up to the table where he was reading The Love Poems of Pablo Neruda； and offered it to him。 It was a gesture that surprised him—almost as much as she surprised herself。 They’d ended up cutting their afternoon classes； cuddling underneath his duvet； and ordering a greasy pizza from Yorkside。 And ever since then； it had been her and Pete。 They’d lived in New Haven together over the summer—Blair had worked on the campaign for a Connecticut senator while Pete did research for his history professor。 At night； they’d wear as little clothing as possible to keep cool in the un…air…conditioned house。 She’d make brunch every weekend and they’d spend Sundays in bed reading the Times。 Being with Pete made her feel like a grown…up。 Pete was a real man； and Nate was just a sad little adolescent who had no idea what he wanted。
Is that so？
“Well； it’s Chuck’s party； and then there’ll probably be Kati Farkas and Isabel Coates and Laura Salmon。 Just these girls from school；” Blair said hurriedly； trying to get the conversation back on track。
“What about Serena？” Pete cocked his head expectantly。 Blair shrugged。 Normally； she loved how Pete remembered every little thing she’d told him—like how the only Audrey Hepburn movie she didn’t like was Wait Until Dark and how she’d accidentally kissed her first Yale interviewer。 But he didn’t know how plicated her best friendship with Serena was； and Blair wanted to keep it that way。
Wonder why？
“I don’t know。” Blair shrugged and scraped her chair away from the table。 They’d barely spoken at all since last winter。 Serena had sent her tickets to the premiere of Coffee at the Palace； but of course Blair hadn’t gone。
She hovered over Pete as he signed his messy boy signature on the check。 Briefly； she wondered if Nate could possibly be at the party； then shook off the idea。 Once； in high school； when she and Serena were smoking Merits on the steps of the Met； they came up with the theory that you had an almos