wanted her exceedingly。 She was something new。 They stood there
folded； suspended in the night。 And his whole being quivered
with surprise； as from a blow。 He wanted her； and he wanted to
tell her so。 But the shock was too great to him。 He had never
realized before。 He trembled with irritation and unusedness； he
did not know what to do。 He held her more gently； gently； much
more gently。 The conflict was gone by。 And he was glad； and
breathless； and almost in tears。 But he knew he wanted her。
Something fixed in him for ever。 He was hers。 And he was very
glad and afraid。 He did not know what to do； as they stood there
in the open； moonlit field。 He looked through her hair at the
moon； which seemed to swim liquid…bright。
She sighed； and seemed to wake up； then she kissed him again。
Then she loosened herself away from him and took his hand。 It
hurt him when she drew away from his breast。 It hurt him with a
chagrin。 Why did she draw away from him？ But she held his
hand。
〃I want to go home；〃 she said； looking at him in a way he
could not understand。
He held close to her hand。 He was dazed and he could not
move； he did not know how to move。 She drew him away。
He walked helplessly beside her； holding her hand。 She went
with bent head。 Suddenly he said； as the simple solution stated
itself to him：
〃We'll get married； Anna。〃
She was silent。
〃We'll get married； Anna； shall we？〃
She stopped in the field again and kissed him； clinging to
him passionately； in a way he could not understand。 He could not
understand。 But he left it all now； to marriage。 That was the
solution now； fixed ahead。 He wanted her； he wanted to be
married to her； he wanted to have her altogether； as his own for
ever。 And he waited； intent； for the acplishment。 But there
was all the while a slight tension of irritation。
He spoke to his uncle and aunt that night。
〃Uncle；〃 he said； 〃Anna and me think of getting married。〃
〃Oh ay！〃 said Brangwen。
〃But how； you have no money？〃 said the mother。
The youth went pale。 He hated these words。 But he was like a
gleaming； bright pebble； something bright and inalterable。 He
did not think。 He sat there in his hard brightness； and did not
speak。
〃Have you mentioned it to your own mother？〃 asked
Brangwen。
〃No……I'll tell her on Saturday。〃
〃You'll go and see her？〃
〃Yes。〃
There was a long pause。
〃And what are you going to marry on……your pound a
week？〃
Again the youth went pale； as if the spirit were being
injured in him。
〃I don't know；〃 he said； looking at his uncle with his bright
inhuman eyes； like a hawk's。
Brangwen stirred in hatred。
〃It needs knowing；〃 he said。
〃I shall have the money later on；〃 said the nephew。 〃I will
raise some now； and pay it back then。〃
〃Oh ay！……And why this desperate hurry？ She's a child of
eighteen； and you're a boy of twenty。 You're neither of you of
age to do as you like yet。〃
Will Brangwen ducked his head and looked at his uncle with
swift； mistrustful eyes； like a caged hawk。
〃What does it matter how old she is； and how old I am？〃 he
said。 〃What's the difference between me now and when I'm
thirty？〃
〃A big difference； let us hope。〃
〃But you have no experience……you have no experience； and
no money。 Why do you want to marry； without experience or
money？〃 asked the aunt。
〃What experience do I want； Aunt？〃 asked the boy。
And if Brangwen's heart had not been hard and intact with
anger； like a precious stone； he would have agreed。
Will Brangwen went home strange and untouched。 He felt he
could not alter from what he was fixed upon； his will was set。
To alter it he must be destroyed。 And he would not be destroyed。
He had no money。 But he would get some from somewhere； it did
not matter。 He lay awake for many hours； hard and clear and
unthinking； his soul crystallizing more inalterably。 Then he
went fast asleep。
It was as if his soul had turned into a hard crystal。 He
might tremble and quiver and suffer； it did not alter。
The next morning Tom Brangwen； inhuman with anger spoke to
Anna。
〃What's this about wanting to get married？〃 he said。
She stood； paling a little； her dark eyes springing to the
hostile； startled look of a savage thing that will defend
itself； but trembles with sensitiveness。
〃I do；〃 she said； out of her unconsciousness。
His anger rose； and he would have liked to break her。
〃You do…you do…and what for？〃 he sneered with contempt。 The
old； childish agony； the blindness that could recognize nobody；
the palpitating antagonism as of a raw； helpless； undefended
thing came back on her。
〃I do because I do；〃 she cried； in the shrill； hysterical way
of her childhood。 〃You are not my father……my father
is dead……you are not my father。〃
She was still a stranger。 She did not recognize him。 The cold
blade cut down； deep into Brangwen's soul。 It cut him off from
her。
〃And what if I'm not？〃 he said。
But he could not bear it。 It had been so passionately dear to
him； her 〃Father……Daddie。〃
He went about for some days as if stunned。 His wife was
bemused。 She did not understand。 She only thought the marriage
was impeded for want of money and position。
There was a horrible silence in the house。 Anna kept out of
sight as much as possible。 She could be for hours alone。
Will Brangwen came back； after stupid scenes at Nottingham。
He too was pale and blank； but unchanging。 His uncle hated him。
He hated this youth； who was so inhuman and obstinate。
Nevertheless； it was to Will Brangwen that the uncle； one
evening； handed over the shares which he had transferred to Anna
Lensky。 They were for two thousand five hundred pounds。 Will
Brangwen looked at his uncle。 It was a great deal of the Marsh
capital here given away。 The youth； however； was only colder and
more fixed。 He was abstract； purely a fixed will。 He gave the
shares to Anna。
After which she cried for a whole day； sobbing her eyes out。
And at night； when she had heard her mother go to bed； she
slipped down and hung in the doorway。 Her father sat in his
heavy silence； like a monument。 He turned his head slowly。
〃Daddy；〃 she cried from the doorway； and she ran to him
sobbing as if her heart would break。
〃Daddy……daddy……daddy。〃
She crouched on the hearthrug with her arms round him and her
face against him。 His body was so big and fortable。 But
something hurt her head intolerably。 She sobbed almost with
hysteria。
He was silent； with his hand on her shoulder。 His heart was
bleak。 He was not her father。 That beloved image she had broken。
Who was he then？ A man put apart with those whose life has no
more developments。 He was isolated from her。 There was a
generation between them； he was old； he had died out from hot
life。 A great deal of ash was in his fire； cold ash。 He felt the
inevitable coldness； and in bitterness forgot the fire。 He sat
in his coldness of age and isolation。 He had his own wife。 And
he blamed himself； he sneered at himself； for this clinging to
the young； wanting the young to belong to him。
The child who clung to him wanted her child…husband。 As was
natural。 And from him； Brangwen； she wanted help； so that her
life might be properly fitted out。 But love she did not want。
Why should there be love between them； between the stout；
middle…aged man and this child？ How could there be anything
between them； but mere human willingness to help each other？ He
was her guardian； no more。 His heart was like ice； his face cold
and expressionless。 She could not move him any more than a
statue。
She crept to bed； and cried。 But she was going to be married
to Will Brangwen； and then she need not bother any more。
Brangwen went to bed with a hard； cold heart； and cursed
himself。 He looked at his wife。 She was still his wife。 Her dark
hair was threaded with grey； her face was beautiful in its
gathering age。 She was just fifty。 How poignantly he saw her！
And he wanted to cut out some of his own heart； which was
incontinent； and demanded still to share the rapid life of
youth。 How he hated himself。
His wife was so poignant and timely。 She was still young and
naive； with some girl's freshness。 But she did not want any more
the fight