gossip girl 10 英文- 第22节

？Are　you　up　here；　Nate？？　Babs？s　voice　boomed　from　the　bottom　of　the　attic　stairwell。　？Do　I　
smell　something　。　。　。illegal？　You　know；　I　was　a　teenager　once；　too？not　so　long　ago！？　


Nate　was　still　waving　his　hands　frantically　when　Babs　emerged　from　the　top　of　the　stairs。　A　sly　
smile　spread　across　her　wrinkled；　slightly　sun…burnished　face。　Her　dyedred　hair　was　pulled　back　in　
a　sloppy　ponytail。　A　halo　of　auburn　frizz　puffed　out　around　her　forehead。　

？There　you　are。？　Babs　sighed。　？Didn？t　you　hear　me　calling　for　you？？　

Nate　shook　his　head；　suddenly　very　concerned　about　how　stoned　he　was。　

？Well；？　she　continued；　strolling　toward　him；　past　the　piles　of　cardboard　boxes　and　all　the　old　toys　
and　junk　that　she　and　the　coach　had　stored　up　there。　？You　know　what　my　husband　said：　while　he？s　
out　of　town；　you？remine。　？　

？Y…y…yeah；？　stammered　Nate。　Coach　was　away　at　some　lacrosse　conference　in　Maryland　for　the　
week；　probably　learning　new　techniques　in　torturing　high　school　boys。　Nate　was　suddenly　
panicked　he　hadn？t　pletely　put　out　the　joint。　Were　his　pants　going　to　catch　fire？　

　Yikes。　

？The　thing　is；　Nate；？　Babs　went　on；　idly　tracing　the　handle…bars　of　a　rusted　Schwinn　bike　that　
was　hanging　from　the　ceiling；　？I　need　a　hand。　Do　me　a　little　favor；　will　you？？　

？？Course。？　he　nodded。　？That？s　what　I？m　here　for。？　

？Well；　this　particular　favor　might　be　outside　of　your　regular　job　description；？　she　admitted。　？But　
if　you？d　be　so　kind　as　to　help　me　out；　maybe　I　won？t　mention　anything　about　the　fact　that　my　attic　
smells　like　a　Grateful　Dead　concert。　What　do　you　say？？　

What　can　you　say　to　blackmail？　

？I？m　。　。　。　I？m　sorry；？　Nate　stumbled。　？It　won？t　happen　again。？　

Babs　laughed。　？You　can？t　possibly　expect　me　to　believe　that。？　She　smiled；　pushing　past　the　
upside…down　bike　toward　Nate；　who　was　still　hunched　by　the　window。　？But　never　mind。　I　need　a　
hand；　and　you？ve　got　two。？　She　took　his　now…callused　hands　in　hers；　examining　them。　？Two　very　
capable；　strong　hands。？　

Nate　wondered　if　he　shouldn？t　warn　Coach　that　his　kids　might　not　look　like　him　for　a　reason：　
Babs　had　probably　bagged　every　grocery　boy　who？d　bagged　her　groceries！　

？What　can　I　do　for　you？？　he　asked；　trying　to　sound　cheerfully　polite；　although　he　heard　his　voice　
warble　in　pure　stoned　terror。　

Babs　dropped　his　hands　and　undid　the　top　button　on　her　pink　cotton　shirt。　？I　decided　to　get　a　little　
surprise　for　the　coach。？　She　undid　another　button。　


？I　see；？　Nate　replied　evenly。　And　he　did　see：　some　very　impressive　cleavage；　and　nary　a　tan　line；　
thanks　to　her　after…noon　regimen　of　topless　sunbathing。

　Nice。　

？I　decided　to　get　a　little　tattoo。？　She　giggled；　undoing　the　last　button　on　her　shirt　and　letting　it　
slide　off　her　shoulders　and　onto　the　floor。　？Just　a　little　something　for　the　coach　to　discover　when　
he　gets　home。？　

？Great。？　He　nodded。Eye　contact；　eye　contact；　eye　contact。　

？But　I？ve　got　to　take　special　care　of　it；？　she　whispered　huskily；　turning　her　back　to　Nate　to　reveal　
a　tiny　tattoo　of　a　butterfly；　its　green　wings　spread　across　the　burnished　leather　of　her　lower　
back。　？But　I　just　can？t　seem　to　reach　it；？　she　continued。　？My　tattoo　artist；　Matty？　He　said　I　have　to　
rub　this　ointment　on　it　every　couple　of　hours。？　

Nate　studied　the　tattoo；　trying　desperately　to　clear　his　head。　What　was　he　supposed　to　do　in　this　
situation？　Babs　was　okay；　but　up　close　her　skin　looked　kind　of　like　a　beat…up　old　baseball　glove；　
and　her　perfume　smelled　like　the　soap　in　a　gas　station　bathroom。　

No　wonder　Coach　Michaels　needed　that　Viagra。　

Speaking　of　him：　he？d　kick　Nate？s　ass；　and　not　just　figuratively；　if　he　knew　that　his　wife　had　
taken　her　top　off　in　Nate？s　presence。　On　the　other　hand；　if　he　didn？t　rub　Babs　with　ointment　she？d　
tell　Coach　Michaels　he？d　been　smoking　pot　on　the　job。　The　coach　probably　wouldn？t　give　Nate　
his　diploma　at　the　end　of　the　summer；　which　would　mean　no　more　Yale；　and　basically　his　whole　
entire　life　would　be　fucked　up。　

His　choices　were　slightly　limited。　

？Where？s　the　ointment？？　he　asked　Babs；　closing　his　eyes　as　he　dabbed　it　on。　He　searched　his　
stoned　brain　for　something　nonsexual　to　talk　about。　？Um；　after　this　I　gotta　get　that　mower　out　of　
the　sun；　otherwise　she　might　blow。　I　don？t　want　to　start　any　fires。？　

Too　late；　honey。Too　late。　

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ABC　Amber　LIT　Converter　v2。02　
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Disclaimer：　All　the　real　names　of　places；　people；　and　events　have　been　altered　or　abbreviated　to　
protect　the　innocent。　Namely；　me。　

　hey　people！　

Isn？t　fate　funny？　You　think　you？ve　got　some　control　over　things；　you　think　you？re　in　charge　of　
life；　but　really；　e　on？we？re　all　just　at　the　mercy　of　the　universe。　I　mean；　we　all　read　our　
horoscopes；　don？t　we？　And　we　all　know　there　are　some　people　who　are　just　。　。　。　connected。　It　
doesn？t　always　make　sense；　but　it？s　not　worth　fighting。　So　I？m　happy　to　report　an　early…bird　
sighting：B　slipping　out　of　the　van　der　Woodsens？　master　bedroom　to　grab　a　fresh　bottle　of　water；　
wearingN　？s　olive　green　polo　（and　nothing　else）。　It？s　just　fate；　people。　Get　used　to　it。　

The　postparty　e…mails　are　starting　to　trickle　in；　and　it　seems　the　big　blowout　was　every　bit　as　
eventful　as　a　Costume　Institute　gala。　Minus　the　gowns？or　any　clothes　whatsoever。　But　the　thing　
everyone？s　talking　about　is　the　birthday　girl　and　the　boy　who　must？ve　been　her　present。　。　。　。　So；　
my　faithful　readers；　I？ve　got　a　poll　for　you：　

You　bump　into　an　old　flame。　What　do　you　do？　

a）　Adopt　a　vaguely　Russian　accent　and　go　straight　for　the　vodka。　

b）　Make　out　with　the　nearest　quasicutie？nothing　like　a　new　flame　to　make　him　jealous。　

c）　Reminisce　about　old　times　。　。　。　and　then　show　him　all　your　new　tricks。　

d）　CallS　and　ask　for　advice？she？s　been　there；　done　all　of　the　above！　

That？s　right：　It　seems　that　not　only　didN　andB　do　some　reuniting；　butS　got　reacquainted　with　an　
old　friend；H　。　Or　more　than　a　friend？　He　was　seen　carrying　her　into　her　bedroom　just　before　
daybreak。　A。　How　sweet！　Now　give　me　the　dirt。　Who　is　he　and　what？s　the　story？　I？m　dying　
for　answers；　and　I　know　you　are　too！　

　your　e…mail　
Q：？　
Dear　GG；　
？　
Just　a　response　to　your　APB：　I　totally　just　spotted　a　vintage　roadster　while　I　was　out　for　my　
morning　run。　It　was　parked　in　a　long　white　gravel　driveway　and　it　looked　like　there　were　people　
sleeping　in　it　together！　Ew！　
？　
？5K　
A：？　
Dear　5K；　
？　


Congrats　on　sticking　to　your　morning　regimen；　and　thanks　for　the　hot　tip。　But　as　usual；　I？m　way　
ahead　of　the　game。　The　errant　threesome　has　been　located　and　I？m　all　boned　up　on　what？s　going　
on。　Let？s　just　hope　your　sleeping　beauties　wake　up　before　they　return！　
？　
？GG　

a　little　friendly　advice　

As　city　dwellers；　we？re　used　to　waking　up　in　our　own　beds。　You　can　party　anywhere；　all　night　
long；　and　a　taxi　is　just　waiting　to　whisk　you　back　to　your　penthouse　or　town　house。　But　it？s　
different　in　the　country。　Everyone　just　。　。　。sleeps　over。　I　know；　I　know。　It　sounds　a　little　grody？　
waking　up　in　some　unfamiliar　house；　very　likely　with　some　unfamiliar　hookup　drooling　on　your　
skirt。　And　yes；　it　can　be　awkward　seeing　everyone　in　the　unforgiving　light；　without　the　benefit　of　
booze…goggles。　But　I？m　in　the　giving　mood；　（hello；　when　am　I　not？）；　and　I？ve　got　some　
advice。　。　。　。　

five　morning…after　pointers　

1）　Country　houses　have　the　nicest　bathrooms。　Take　a　nice　steam　and　feel　free　to　bring　a　friend。　
The　shower？s　big　enough　for　two；　and　sharing　is　caring！　

2）　Yes；　you　look　like　a　mess。　So　feel　free　to　go　ahead　and　borrow　something　from　the　host。　But　if　
you　take　some　undies；　just　keep　？em。　It？ll　be　our　secret。　

3）　Head　hurts？　Gather　up　the　leftover　champagne　for　mimosas；　and　slip　a　little　Kahl？a　into　the　
French…press。　It　might　just　get　the　party　restarted。　

4）　Help　yourself　to　the　lady　of　the　house？s　beauty　products。　Mommies　always　have　the　very　best　
eye　cream。　

5）　Still　not　feeling　any　better？　There　may　still　be　some　prescription…strength　Motrin　leftover　from　
Granny？s　fall。　Hey；　hangovershurt　！　

Okay；　kids；　time　for　me　to　take　my　own　advice　and　follow　it　up　with　a　little　dip　in