rder and with one stroke of the pen； between strokes on Too…Too； he executed the blank patent Cling had signed。 So there。 I'm no fake。 I'm a real queen！〃
〃Well； I'm very happy to hear it；〃 said Madison。 〃But when I get finished with my work here； you can go back to Earth。〃
〃Hah！〃 said Teenie。 〃I don't think you've heard a single thing I said about hostage queens。 If Voltar takes it into its head to invade Earth； the Apparatus will knock off any royalty around there or anybody calling themselves queens or kings and Endow will appoint me the Hostage Queen of Earth。 I won't ever be able to go back there but Endow will get his whack at the taxes… … 〃
〃Teenie； this is madness！〃
〃There you go；〃 said Teenie； suddenly speaking in a Park Avenue accent； 〃I try to educate you in Palace City politics and you insult me。 And you're just a moner； not Royalty like me。〃 She blew and exploded a bubble for emphatic emphasis。
They had reached the coast and were now departing； at six hundred miles an hour； across what seemed a green and endless sea。 No wonder the map Flick was using looked so blank。 It was mainly water。
Madison nudged the footwoman in the front seat… he couldn't reach the driver。 〃Tell him；〃 he whispered； 〃to turn on something that describes Relax Island。〃
〃I'm not talking to him；〃 the footwoman whispered back。 〃He says he's reformed and if he doesn't re…reform； I'm going to black his other eye。〃
〃You've already done him damage enough；〃 whispered Madison。
〃No； that was his bedroom girl。 I haven't begun on him yet。〃
Madison had the distinct sensation he was living in a madhouse。 Teenie with her jabber about being Queen of Earth had thoroughly upset him。 And now here was another woman acting up。 Oh； but his mother had been right！
He had the sensation that his best…laid plans were going up in smoke。 He thought sadly about poor Heller…Wister as they flew across what seemed an endless sea； going further and further； as he thought； from any sensible PR approach。 What the blazes did Teenie mean by 〃military〃？
Chapter 6
Flick； nervously navigating and driving at ten thousand feet； looked all around： there was no land now anywhere in sight； only heaving green sea。
He pushed a button on his panel and in a screen alongside of the map； Madison read：
RELAX ISLAND； formerly known to the ancients as Teon； stronghold of the since departed sea people。 Royal preserve of early Voltarian monarchs but fell into disuse fifty thousand years ago。 Deeded to the Royal Family of Flisten after the Treaty of Flisten。 Located in the semitropical grid 18/103； Western Ocean； 883 miles from the central continent mainland。 Area 305 square miles。 Surrounded by vertical black cliffs 2000 to 5000 feet in height； no beaches or harbors。 Highest altitude； 9056 feet； Mount Teon located at north end； which； though snow…capped in colder months； blocks inclement storms。 Island formed by geological upthrust of volcanic peak but volcano long since extinct。 Mean annual temperature 76 degrees。 First view； clouds usually clutching Mount Teon or reflective sky discolor。 Warning to fishing craft and all aerial traffic； do not attempt to land。
Madison was chilled。 What a bleak and awful place that must be！ Black cliffs； no harbors； warning not to land。 What on Earth was Teenie thinking of； ing out here？
Flick leaned toward him and whispered； 〃I think I'm lost。 You're supposed to just punch in the grids but I think this Model 99 is lost； too！ I forgot to read my ground distance meter when we left the mainland。 That ocean down there is full of toothers； some of them fifty feet long and if they don't get you； the airborne flying batfish will。 Visibility is getting bad。 Can you get permission to turn back？〃
Madison turned。 Others had not heard Flick but the fact that he had moved caused the guard officer to glare。 Teenie was deeply lost in her own thoughts； scowling。
Madison said to Flick； 〃For heaven's sake； find the place。 I'm not tackling any more women today！〃
〃Me neither；〃 said Flick。 And he began to peer to the left and right。
There was a mist across the sun which made visibility poor。 〃Haven't you got a radar？〃 said Madison。
〃You mean beams？ Oh； yeah； beams；〃 and Flick hastily began to twiddle knobs。 The screens stayed blank。 〃I ain't no ocean pilot；〃 said Flick。 〃When I crash 'em I like to have somebody find the remains。 Look at that distance meter。 We've already e twenty…one hundred miles。〃
〃Wait a minute；〃 said Madison。 〃You're only scanning ahead。 What if we already passed it？〃
Flick hastily twiddled more controls and shot the beams behind them。
THERE WAS THE MOUNTAIN！
They'd passed right over the top of it with only a hundred feet to spare！ It had been hidden by morning clouds。
Madison let out a gasp of relief。 They had overshot by twenty miles！ Flick slued the airbus around； reducing speed； dropping altitude。
Instantly； the moment they changed course； their speakers boomed； 〃Warning； warning Model 99…3。 This is Satellite Monitor Control； Planetary Defense。 We have a Slaughter Warhead ready to launch。 Do NOT attempt to land on Relax Island。〃
Perspiration started up on Flick's low forehead as he hastily veered off。 He grabbed a microphone。 〃I been ordered to land here！〃 And he hastily grabbed Madison's identoplate and pushed it in the slot。
〃We're sorry； that won't do；〃 said Planetary Defense。 〃There's been no landing on Relax Island for fifty years； but you're not the first one to try。 Clear off at once！〃
A hand was plucking Madison's sleeve and he turned to find the major…domo pushing something at him。 It was an identoplate。 He passed it to Flick who withdrew Madison's and put the new one in the slot。 His hand was shaking so； he could hardly get it in。
〃Is this a trick or something？〃 boomed Planetary Defense。 〃We'll have to clear this with Government City。 Stand by。〃
Madison and Flick looked at each other in dismay。
There was a pause； then； 〃Would Your Majesty accept our apologies？ We are merely being diligent in executing Exterior Division orders that no one may land on Relax Island without the express approval of Your Majesty。 We bow。〃
The major…domo grabbed the mike。 〃Her Majesty graciously thanks your diligence and watchful eye and verifies that the order is still in force。 She releases you to your duties。〃
〃We kiss the hem of her robe。 Out。〃
Flick said； 〃Phewww！ A Slaughter Warhead！ You were right； Chief； in saying this would be an awful day。〃 He passed Teenie's identoplate back over his shoulder to the major…domo。
Madison had been electrified by the exchange。 Teenie wasn't lying； for once。 Even Planetary Defense and Government City had her registered as a queen。
And seconds later； he got another shock。 They had dropped below the cloud layer and there； dappled in patches of sunlight； lay the island。
It was BIG！ He hadn't realized that it took so much ground to make up 305 square miles。 From four thousand feet； you couldn't even take it all in。
There were gentle hills and forests。 There were waterfalls and rivers。 There were squares of fields walled by stone on which crops were growing。 There were herds of animals in meadows。 And there were little villages with white walls nestling here and there in the brilliant verdure of folded hills。 Dropping even lower； he saw that the masses of color were flowering trees and flower gardens。
He tried to pare it to any island he knew of on Earth for beauty。 Tahiti？ No。 It was ten times that。
WHAT A PARADISE！
〃Where do I land？〃 squeaked Flick。
〃In front of the palace；〃 pointed the major…domo。
Madison saw it。 It was partially up the slope of Mount Teon and so masked by flowering trees that the size of it was obscured until they were almost landed。 Then it burst upon him that he was looking at a building that must be a thousand feet long； curving elegantly upon the mountain breast。 It was only three stories high but it must reach back into the mountain。
There was a landing target； the usual blue circle nearly gone。 Weeds were pushing through the stone steps which led down to it。
Then Madison took a closer look。 All along the curving palace front； what he had taken to be green scallops of decoration was moss； hanging on faded metal ropes which bore only a fleck or two of gilt。 Dead limbs